One year, eight months, one week, and one day since we got in line for the wildest roller coaster of our lives… This is just the line.
Happy, but feeling slightly unfinished. I’m happy just cause I am. I feel really good today. No particular reason. I think drilling my blessings into my own head is paying off. It’s tough work. Poor me. I’m also happy because I figured out how to decorate this blog without using a premade template! For those of you who don’t blog, I’ll explain a little. There are websites where you can buy or download for free (along with their advertisements) blog designs and layouts. The one I had up was from a website that anyone could go to. Who knows how many other blogs had the same theme as us. Now no other blog in the blogosphere looks like ours and that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy. I think it’s pretty cute, if I do say so myself.
I’m feeling unfinished because Josh woke me up from a really good dream this morning. One of those dreams that feel so real that when you wake up it hangs with you a good while. I was dreaming that someone (I can still see her face, but I don’t know her) was handing me a baby, not just to hold, but to keep. She looked happy but also sad as she handed the little one to me all wrapped in a blanket. Just as I reached out…Suffice to say, I wasn’t happy Josh woke me up.
I’m making stuffed bell peppers for dinner tonight and I’ve been looking forward to them all day. I stuff them with ground turkey, brown rice, onion, and cheese, and then serve with more veggies on the side. Easy, healthy, and super yummy.
Thoughts about our child:
I’m looking forward to seeing how you will challenge me. What will you argue with me about? What will be your learning style? Will you be stubborn? Will you be compassionate? I’m looking forward to watching your personality and your convictions form. I look forward to helping you become a functional, contributing, healthy, and happy member of society.
Thoughts about our expectant mom:
What are you looking for? What about us will you be drawn to? I look forward to our first meeting. My heart will pound, my hands will sweat, my mind will race, and then I’ll hug you.
This week God:
Reminded me that I am His, for better or for worse. But really there is no worse. My body doesn’t do what I want. Getting pregnant feels like it should be built in automatically. But God knows my body. He knows the number of hairs on my head. He knows me better than I know myself. My body will do what He wants. This is just my earth-suit.
“Are not two sparrows sold for a cent? And yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So do not fear; you are more valuable than many sparrows.”-Matthew 10:29-31
Read about why I started Motherhood Mondays here.